The interior of my car smelled like a dead rat - thanks to the rain Gods who whimsically let loose torrents of rain in the otherwise clear sky, water-logging the streets of Guwahati. It was my ill luck that I got stuck in the waterlogged street with sewage and water from the nearby drains seeping inside my car. What next? Fear, exasperation and hours of being stuck inside the car in the middle of the road and the stench that followed till a couple of days later, reminded us of the ordeal.

Yes, the arrival of monsoon in Guwahati is a call to prepare ourselves to say goodbye to our two and four-wheelers and say hello to the boat service since the roads don’t remain roads but rather transform into tiny rivulets every time there is a heavy shower. Thus, the monsoons create a feel of the Gondolas and Venice right in the heart of our city! Denizens of Zoo Road, Nabin Nagar, Anil Nagar and the like, will definitely agree with me here.

However, God forbid, whenever you find yourself stuck in a waterlogged road, remember to book an appointment with the nearest car servicing center to get rid of the offensive smell that would stick to your vehicle for days. And sometimes, your car’s engine would die down right in the middle of the water. Soon you would need to loosen your purse strings to pay and request the boys loitering in the vicinity to push your vehicles to safety. Yes, rain does bring in employment opportunities for such boys giving them a chance to earn some fast bucks in the process. Rickshaw pullers also have a good time charging exorbitant fares for short distances, making hay while the sun (doesn’t) shine(s)!

Guwahatians need to plan their day according to the weather forecast. If you are planning to venture towards the flood prone areas, then the only solution is to abort your plan. I know of people who have had to camp on the high grounds of the Chandmari fly-over inside their cars or had to go as uninvited guests to relative’s houses to escape spending the night in the waterlogged streets.

Many people have to incur heavy damage to their house and property due to the rains. It also creates difficulties to office goers and school children who have to navigate through waterlogged manholes and overflowing drains.

But what do we do to get rid of this menace during rains? We sit back and enjoy the days without any care in the world and only when the monsoons arrive, we press our panic buttons and feel sorry for our plight. We then indulge in what we do best – play the blame game. Mostly, we blame the government for its incompetence in dealing with the problem of artificial floods, which creates havoc in the lives of people. Sometimes we blame the municipality for not clearing clogged drains but we seldom blame ourselves for throwing filth in the drains or constructing houses and apartments caring two hoots for the drainage system.

The problem of floods is an old one. And it has been recurring year after year without much intervention from the government or authorities. We are getting no wiser from our past experiences. It is like letting our problem stand for years and let it deteriorate and grow grimmer with every passing year!

Probably, we have surrendered to this perennial problem and are waiting for the day when the almighty Himself would intervene in frustration of our lahe-lahe attitude. Or, we may have to wait for some thousand more years when evolution may take its own natural course and we develop fins to adapt to our changing scenes! We might become part time mermaids to get us through the havoc of floods and, if the scientists work faster than evolution, they might even come up with amphibian vehicles to run smoothly on land as well as water! But till then, simply enjoy the days by imagining that Venice visits Guwahati whenever dark clouds hover over our skies and turn the shower we love to partake in into a nightmare of our daily lives.

Finding Me, a book of English poems by Atreyee Borgohain is an existential narrative, posthumously published. These poems have been conceived in a time span of a couple of years. She had to race against time in order to live and know life through and through. Her poems echo her inner voice, one who was lost in the fear of loneliness and isolation.

This poetry collection looks back to the past as well as it looks ahead to the future. They were conceived at a moment when the poet had felt vulnerable at the hands of life’s rebuttals and had started to find shelter in her words. Words allowed her to witness the conflict of her own sensitive soul with the harsh reality of the little time that was spared by fate at her hand. Atreyee was quashed not only between the two worlds that pushed her into the abysmal pit of nothingness, but every other moment when she confronted reality where she realized that there was a strange compulsion in her to locate herself inside the cocoon of another imagined world.

A sensitivity is felt in all of Atryee’s poems. Relationships emerging through her verse lines are emotional when some absurd moments of time threatened her identity. She was trying to find her place in that strange universe. The “mystic alleys” bothered her and she was pained to see the false promises of life and found everything running out of that quickly caught her in the quagmire of doubt and derision. Cognitive dissonance marked her poetry when we discover an oscillation between belief and disbelief.

Finding me is an interface between reality and illusion. Subterranean attitude of life takes us to an unknown terrain of truth where everything thought turned her towards the obscure when there was nothing for her to turn to.

So hard to find love here, so hard

Among the vast strangeness of concrete dwelling…

The overall atmosphere of the book is one of a drugged stupor of sadness and a terrible ennui; the poems are heart melting and they ring a bell to usher us into the familiarity of our own going about in the past or present. There are forces which compelled Atreyee to realize that the world was ever changing which in turn made her realize that truth was too harsh and that life in fact was rather transitory. The concrete walls between relationships had bothered her much to the limit of sobriety. The temporal world and its limited emotions and time pricked her much; she was made aware that she was caged in within herself in a plastic vessel where all was too real and compelling to this young soul. Almost all her poems reflect this phenomenon of a vulnerable loneliness and that feeling of low with a disbelief that often accompany it.

Empty hopes follow me,

Unending time, restless moments,

Yet there is nothing to believe.

Her poems reflect the urgent need to escape; she had felt that she was restlessly searching for another world far beyond.  It contains poems, her questionings of the ways and means to comprehend the dualities of passing time and the otherness of the realities of life. The question that her verses primarily poses to us is this – What can we do about human suffering? Have our established ways to deal with the existence of pain are just enough? Atreyee in fact was trying to relocate herself here and thereafter -

Maybe I’ll be gone some other place

Till the time you realize that

I am not there.

The concept of time is presented very perceptively where the propensity of time within the span of this life was almost everything to her, and her poems try to coerce upon the rhythm of life to the verge of its exclusion.

Time is still

You are passing…

Atreyee was verily fearful about this mortal life, and she could almost foretell the love that her father would feel for her when she would not more be there beside him. The entire course of her poems was framed within this dilemma of life and its consequences at the final parting. Aitreyee however was certain that if there was to be immortality, then it was only in love.

Let me be

Until my soul is released

There is a poem addressed to her mother; though it was written as a school assignment, it carries her sincere gratitude and love for her mother even when the other world had closed upon her sensibilities with a sad consequence. Atreyee who was suffocated living within the bounds of this world had said -

No bonds to tie me up

No home to go to

The collection ends with the autumn of her life which she had almost prophesied as happening exactly on time, and also as the mundane way of a world without love and its innocence was becoming not acceptable to her tender understanding.

It is the autumn of life,

when nothing remains to shed.

Finding me is a beautifully crafted collection which shall remain a meaningful endeavour of a mother’s promise to her daughter to keep alive her cherished words that tug at every heart strings.

Published by: Wordsmith Publishers, Guwahati, Price: Rs 100/-

Q1. I have a peculiar problem. Whenever I meet new people, I feel they like me instantly and we go on to develop good friendships. But when they meet my best friend they do not respond to her much. But my best friend is very pretty. She usually gets upset when this happens.  What should I do? (Name withheld)

Ans- From what you have written, it appears that you are a warm and friendly person. Maybe that’s why people can relate to you and feel comfortable in your company. On the other hand, your friend may experience difficulty in interacting with new people and therefore may come across as cold and unfriendly. You can definitely help her out by helping her develop her social manners. She would benefit much by attending a few sessions of counselling on social manners.

Q2. My parents always criticize me in front of others. They are never happy with what I do and always find fault with me. I am quite good in my studies but they are never satisfied. Of late, I have started getting headaches whenever they scold me. (Name withheld)

Ans- I can understand how you must be feeling. Your headache is basically due to the stressful situation that you are going through. Try and stay as calm as possible even if you get scolded. Do your studies properly and leave the rest. If people are happy, it is good and even if they aren’t, you should still not allow yourself to feel bad. Try and be self-contained. Do not look for appreciation from others. Also communicate to your parents that their behaviour is causing you much hurt. Share your feelings with them. Don’t talk to them rudely. Politely discuss your problem with them. You will also benefit from relaxation techniques. If necessary take the help of a trained psychologist or counsellor.

Gariasi Dutta is a psychiatric social worker in Down Town Hospitals. Readers may send their concerns to d_gariasi@rediffmail.com or mélange.sentinel@rediffmail.com or call her at 9864055560

Q.  The government is mulling to bring a law under which a husband will have to legally pay a definite amount to his wife from his salary and the Ministry has started preparing a draft in this regard. What is you view on this proposed draft?

1. Pushpalata Kalit (Housewife): We welcome the bill since it will be a great help to women who are left on their own by their husbands. Housewives do not have any liberty to spend money.  Since, in the Indian society, it is generally the men who earns and the women who look after their families, often in some cases the women don’t have the money to buy their requirements.

2. Snigdha Borgohain (Housewife): Whether the bill is passed or not, my wife has a say in all financial matters relating to my family. Even when I have to buy anything, I consult her and she has equal say in every financial decision.

3. Tapash Majumdar (Government employee): She is not my employee that I have to pay her. I have always given her money whenever she asked for it and sometimes even without her asking. Marriages are based on understanding not on monetary gains. She loves doing the household chores because it is her family and not because she wants to be paid for it. I am not her boss. The Bill is a good one since it would provide security to women who are not given equal say in financial matters of the family. But in my house, no I do not need it.

4. Ranju Nath (House wife): I am relieved to hear that the government is mulling over such a Bill. Now I don’t have to keep asking my husband for money everytime I want to spend. And I believe like me, this Bill will definitely give liberty to many other women who have to depend on their husband for every little thing.

5. Mousumi Pradhan (House wife): In case the husband leaves the wife for some reasons, this Bill will help provide financial security to the wife. Hence, I support this Bill and hope it gets passed soon.

6. Anjed Shek (Rickshaw puller) : How can a person like me, who can hardly sustain his family with the meager income I earn afford to pay my wife. It is not that I am denying her of her right but it is not simply possible given my occupation. Whatever little I earn is for my family and children.

7. Tuhina Yadav (Housewife): It is a good bill would give more security to women in case they are separated from their husbands. I support the Bill and it should definitely be passed. It will help empowering women who sacrifices a lot in life to take care of their families. It will be like appreciating their roles.

8. Tanaz Mehjabeen (Housewife): Well! Staying at home was a choice I made in life. My husband never told me that I should not work. But I wanted to look after my family, and take care of my children and hence chose not to work. I do not support the Bill primarily because it fixes an amount to be given to the wife. Well our husbands earn for the family, don’t they? So why should we demand money from them?

9. Amar Kalita (Banker): Most of the financial matters of my family are handled by my wife so the Bill makes no difference.

10. Maloti Sharma (house wife): I love doing the household chores not because I am bound to do them. It is my family and I don’t expect anything in return. Giving me a part of my husband’s salary will therefore be an insult to my love for my family.

11. Dipak Kalita (Shopkeeper): This is a good move but the Bill may be misutilized by some women.

12. Yash Yadav (Businessman): As far as there is understanding between the two partners and both have equal say in all matters, I believe the Bill doesn’t count.