A Chiaroscuro of Emotions

There is a measured movement on the part of the young poet from inwardness and solitude towards the outer world in an attempt to reach out to people, seek companionship and practice altruism. The poems reflect the acute sensitivity and awareness of the poet in relation to herself and her surroundings. The fact that the poet is well versed in the nuances of language is manifested in the splendid choice of words along with the deft use of alliteration, metaphors and personification to embellish the verses. Beyond any doubt, Celeste will definitely prove to be a delightful read not only for poetry buffs and connoisseurs of art but also for the uninitiated. 

Adolescence is one of the most decisive stages when children go through various physical and emotional changes as they journey from childhood to maturity. Ashwika Mahanta's debut collection of poetry titled 'Celeste' invites readers to go on an introspective journey and explore the psyche of a child growing up amidst the stresses and pressures of adolescence. At a time, when we frequently get to hear dismal news about the struggles of children who are trying to cope with multiple challenges and are also contending with the pressures of excelling in almost everything (amidst stiff competition), this poetic endeavour does come as a breath of fresh air. The collection is an inspiration for children to 'not give up' and face life headlong by tapping into their hidden potentialities. There is no better way than poetry to channelize one's inner turmoil and negative emotions into positive ones; according to the poetess. She aptly declares in the Preface: "This world is engaged in an unending race, which might haunt us if we ever think of giving up. And even if we do think of giving up at some point, we must gather the strength to rejoin the race."

With a thought-provoking foreword by eminent litterateur and former Professor and head of the department of English, Dibrugarh University, Dr. Pona Mahanta, this book is a collection of thirty evocative poems. As Dr. Mahanta points out "Her young mind appears to be in turmoil while struggling in the path of creation"; reading Ashwika's poetry is like experiencing an emotional roller coaster as she acquaints us with several concerns related to growing up ranging from loneliness, confusion, angst, depression and mood swings to friendship, peer pressure, dreams, fantasies and love. The poems make us surf a tide of sentiments (that are initially depressive and struggling) to gradually reach a crescendo of positivity and awareness of one's strength.

One of the evils that children or specifically teenagers might fall prey to is substance abuse. In the very first poem titled 'Cannabis', the poet depicts the restlessness and paranoia on the part of adolescents who seek comfort in addictive substances to drive away their angsts and frustrations. Here the poet highlights the harmfulness of using such substances by youngsters. The poem 'Crestfallen" too has a similar theme and speaks of addictions that teens might take recourse to out of loneliness and a sense of futility (lack of purpose in life).

In 'Dismay', the speaker narrates the toxic experience, which she goes through. For instance she describes a wheezing chest and a choking sensation to explain her pent up feelings and bad memories. The phrase 'black tears are my words', in the poem 'Ephialtes' aptly describes the suffering that has stemmed from loneliness and feelings of betrayal by a dear one.

Moodiness, which is a state of mind synonymous with teenagers is reflected upon in the poem 'My Life' wherein the poet shares a state of despondency as she mulls over the state of her life bereft of any magic or good things. She is disheartened by the fact that she is not understood by others. She poignantly says -"Tears say many things,/But no one will understand./ 'Cause it's not their concern,/My mind seems jammed." The sensitivity of an adolescent, especially a girl child who is often vulnerable to crying is explored in 'Crybaby' where the speaker tries to helplessly control her tears. The poem 'What do I feel' explores the theme of loneliness again as she says "I am living inside my dark world". One of the most graphic poems titled 'Lucid Dreams' explores a dream or a fantasy while the next poem, which is expressive enough and titled 'Choose love' talks about the feeling of love and the angst of separation.

The young poet explores other issues, as well, revolving round the life of teens. 'Monthlies' tries to capture the pain and anxiety of the girl child with regards to menstruation and the superstitions surrounding it. The enchantment of games as an inextricable part of childhood is recreated in the poem 'Ludo'. The poem 'Pride' tells us how it is difficult for some to stoop low or how some people treat others with malice because of pride but ironically God in fact "looks at us as one and the same". 'Grow up now' depicts the tantrums of a little girl who "whines for not getting what she wants". The craze and fetish for slim and perfect bodies among teens publicized by the media is beautifully encapsulated in the poem titled 'Faultless'.

There is a gradual shift in feeling from dejection to optimism and buoyancy as seen in the poem 'Estrella' which exhorts the soul to rise and shine and be aware of one's strength and possibilities: "You're the unique one,/For no one else/ Can find a diamond/ Like you." In a similar vein, 'Timidity' encourages one to love one's own self and be positive despite setbacks as the speaker observes: "You're beautiful any way". Through the poem 'Blonde', the speaker with a sense of self worth announces that she is now "Leaving the past behind/Wasting no time," and "I started to know myself,/Like no one used to before". The poem titled 'Dear Diary', too shows that the speaker has reinvented herself with a positive outlook and has come to love herself at the end of the day despite the slew of negativities and obstacles. She also wishes to become "someone's guardian spirit" and thus reach out to others. In the final poem 'Future Me', the speaker visualizes herself as a successful person who is able to receive the applause that she has always wanted. She has now won the battle as she declares "Everything is now settled,/And my eyes are tired,/While becoming the winner of the battle". She also envisions herself as one who struggles to save and uplift others and the same act of kindness gives her the cause to smile and live.

There is thus a measured movement on the part of the young poet from inwardness and solitude towards the outer world in an attempt to reach out to people, seek companionship and practice altruism. Moreover, awareness of the changes and problems of adolescence and sharing those experiences with the reader proves to be a healing exercise for the poet too. The poems reflect the acute sensitivity and awareness of the poet in relation to herself and her surroundings. The fact that the poet is well versed in the nuances of language is manifested in the splendid choice of words along with the deft use of alliteration, metaphors and personification to embellish the verses. Beyond any doubt, Celeste will definitely prove to be a delightful read not only for poetry buffs and connoisseurs of art but also for the uninitiated.

By: Shyamolima Saikia

Also Read: She & Everything - A Window to Her Soul

Also Watch: