Never forget that falling in love is a serious business
Shreeprakash Sharma
(The writer is a Principal of
Jawahar Navodaya Vidyalaya, Dinthar Veng, Mamit, District-Mamit (Mizoram). He can be reached at spsharma.rishu@gmail.com)
Prateek, a 17-year-old boy of class XII in a prestigious private school, always topped his class and this made his parents and teachers proud of him. His parents wanted to see him as an IAS officer. Things had been going in the right direction until the one time he reached home when his school closed for two months. Prateek’s parents were amazed to find their son bizarrely distracted and disappointed. Unlike past few years, this time he preferred to stay alone and avoided the company of his bosom friends he used to once dote upon. Nor was he serious in his studies anymore. He would keep sleeping or talking on his mobile phone. Prateek had totally changed and this disturbing situation made his parents very worried and alarmed.
When the things aggravated from bad to worse, Prateek’s mother got restless. One evening while Prateek was lying in his bed, his mother came to him with tea and very affectionately yet almost fearfully, asked him, “My son, what has happened to you? I have been watching that you have not been behaving naturally or living your life normally since you have come here. Do not get scared and tell me the problems which have befallen you.”
Mother’s question came to Prateek as a bolt from the blue and it touched his heart. But Prateek tried to hide the agonies which had been gnawing away at his mental peace. The answer which Prateek gave to his mother was not at all satisfying and convincing,
“Nothing mom, why do you feel like that? I am alright. There is nothing to worry about!”
But the mother did not buy her son’s story. She kept quiet for some time and finally said, “But things are not the same my son since you have reached home. I can see you are so mentally disturbed. There is something wrong which has been perplexing you. You are my son, and I can well understand your pain and predicament. Tell me everything clearly without any fear my boy. We are more experienced and have also seen the world. Maybe I can help you.”
Prateek could not hide anything any longer and began crying bitterly clinging to his mother. He finally started narrating what has stolen his heart and bereft him of his mental peace, “Mom, I have fallen in love with Simran, my class mate and it has now reached to the point where I have been finding myself quite incapable of managing the situation. I love her so much mom and I cannot live without her now. I want to marry her. Simran is also ready to elope to marry me. Now you tell me mom what I should do?”
Now it was the turn of Prateek’s mother to get stunned. But very soon she controlled herself and broke the silence. She made him understand what marriage meant and what responsibilities were associated with what he did not know is going to be one of the biggest challenges of life. However, it was not easy for Prateek to understand what his mother tried to enlighten him about but very soon the situation became crystal clear and Prateek succeeded in recovering himself.
Prateek returned to school after the summer vacation but with the unbelievable U-turn changes in his perception about life and marriages. In fact, the case of Prateek may seem to be an anecdote but the love stories of this ilk are galore, especially in this revolutionary age of the social media and the information technology.
An important question arises here - Can the very natural and innate human sentiment like that of love be avoided as an essential evil? The second question which also raises its head in the anticipation of an answer is - What precautions must be taken even if one fails to prevent himself from falling in love?
It is not hard to accept that love is the most intrinsic emotion of the Homo sapiens. But falling in love at the age of adolescence which is considered as the golden period for career formation may prove to be incongruous and very destructive. Because falling in love is such a phenomenon which calls for the fulfillment for a lot of promises. It also heavily disturbs the concentration power required in for serious study and business. Falling in love at the stage of student life, though beyond one’s control and conscience, is like a double-edged sword and so, one need to be very cautious.
Money plays an important role in love, especially in this age of materialistic world. Economic interdependence must be treated as the prerequisite for liking and loving someone. And what about physical intimacy? In fact, love generally is considered as the licence of indulging in what we may call the sexual promiscuity. The breed of pure and platonic love has amazingly been on the fast wane. So when in love one must be wary about what they want from this relationship- body or heart?
Love is a great sacrifice. It must not be treated as barter system which involves exchange of expensive gifts. Helping someone you love, to reach the pinnacle of success is true love. Doing your best to bail your sweet hearts out from difficult situations is the truer love. Having the intense and undying feelings of empathy and sympathy with whom you love is the truest love which runs slow but lasts the longest.