Mind Over Matter | 20 Jan, 2019

1. My school-going daughter who is in class 1 looks very tired when she wakes up in the morning. At night she delays going to sleep, finding different excuses. In the morning, she is very irritated and cranky. How much sleep does a school going-kid need? Please suggest.

(Name withheld)

Ans: A school going child requires minimum 10 hours of sleep every night. Depending on the school timing of your daughter, fix a regular bed time routine for her. On waking up in the morning, you will have to take into consideration how much time your daughter would require to get ready for school along with completing toilet routine. Accordingly fix her bedtime at night. This way, she will get a good night's sleep and feel rested in the morning. Further make sure there are no distractions for your daughter before going to bed at night. Especially avoid television before going to bed at night.

1. Dear Madam, I am a very good looking 15-year old boy and most girls like me. However some boys also like me. They try to sexually abuse me too. I feel like hitting them. What can I do to them? I feel afraid of disclosing this to my parents. Please help me madam.

Name withheld

Ans: We should never allow ourselves to suffer in the hands of such people. Please stand up and protest against these acts. It is wrong what they are doing to you. There is nothing to be ashamed off. Sexual abuse is a crime like other offences. People can be punished. You don't have to suffer in silence. Please share with your family immediately. You have every right to stand up and protest. Please do so. If there is anything else you can always contact me. All the best!

1. I am a 24-year old boy. I have a habit of drinking alcohol regularly since the last 5 years. I have bad relations with my family members especially my father and mother. My father is always finding faults in me and then I go and drink. I was working previously but stopped since one year. I have been asking my father to set up a business for me but he does not listen. I am feeling very frustrated.

Name withheld

Ans: After reading your letter I feel you are badly into the blame game. How can you blame the people around for your problems? Everyone is not that bad. You are taking alcohol by your own choice. No one is forcing you. Your father may scold you for things you don't do. That does not mean you go and consume alcohol or drugs. That is not the solution. Try and improve yourself if your father is pointing out areas of improvement for you. It is for your betterment after all! Why should your father set up a business for you? Do it yourself. How can you expect your family to do everything for you when you are simply hell bent on ruining your life? Join a de-addiction programme at the earliest and start life afresh.

1. I keep getting headaches frequently. I have consulted several doctors but everyone says that there is no internal problem. It is mainly tension headache. When I take medicine it is under control. But if I work too much it comes back again.

(Name withheld)

Ans: Well since you are aware of the triggering factor (excessive work), it would be beneficial if you take up a few preventive measures. Definitely medication will help to a large extent. Apart from that you will benefit from taking up some relaxation activities (take up some hobbies of your choice). Further try and organize your work life in a manner that you have ample free time too, at hand after completing your work. At times, we tend to get tense due to poor time management and organization skills. Take a good look at how you are presently managing your work schedule. These factors will help a lot. Further engage in meditation. You will feel much better. All the best!