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Mind Over Matter | 15 Mar, 2019

Mind Over Matter | 15 Mar, 2019

Sentinel Digital Desk

Hello madam. I am a 20 year-old girl. Can u please suggest me how to open up with people? I have a boyfriend of the same age, since the last six years, but I can't even open up everything to him. And I tend to hide away the things that he does not accept, and at the end we have a fight after he comes to know about it. Please help give me a solution to this.

(Name withheld)

Ans: Some people are introverted by nature. They take time to open up to people. There is nothing wrong in it. However, is it just hesitance to share your thoughts and feelings or is there an issue with trust? That is something you need to figure out. Apart from that, one can always develop one's personality. Take up hobbies of your choice. Participate in relaxation activities. All the best.

  1. I am 16 years old girl and I am facing problems while dealing with my parents. I feel they don't understand me and they never even try. They always compare me with others. If I tell them that I want to go somewhere with my friends, they ignore my wishes and ask me not to compare myself with my friends. But when the matter of studies comes up, they just compare me with others.

If my friends attend school and I remain absent on that day, they simply start comparing me with them and reprimand me. When I am tired after school and tuitions and want to take rest, they reprimand me for not studying along with my friends. I just feel irritated with all this and want to stay alone but then also, they don't provide me with any space; they just check my messages, phone calls, etc. I am just totally fed up with all this. Please suggest.

(Name withheld)

Ans: I feel what you are going through. Don't let yourself get upset. It is not going to help you. Parents want what is best for their children. However, at times, someone's manner of putting across their wishes may be different. Instead of motivating and inspiring us, it demoralizes us. It is essential to look beyond. However, it would be beneficial for you to sit down with your parents and have a heart-to-heart discussion. You could also talk to an elder in the family who could help you out. Take care.

(Ms. Gariasi Dutta, MSW (TISS) is a Psychological Counsellor at down town hospital, Guwahati. She may be contacted at 98640-55560 or mail at dutta.gariasi@gmail.com)

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