MIND OVER MATTER | 20 Jan, 2020

11. Madam, I am a girl of 18 years and studying in Standard 11. I recently broke up with my boyfriend. I have moved on in my life. But my boyfriend says that he wants me back in his life. I told him that it's not possible but he is forcing me to accept him again. Please advise me what to do.

(Name withheld)

Ans: My girl! No one in this world can force you to do something against your will. Unless you allow that to do so! You have moved on with your life and that's that. If someone else is having a problem because of that, it's their problem. Not yours. Stay busy with your studies and other extracurricular activities. Don't allow anyone else to rule over your life.

1. I am a 20 year-old male. In my childhood, I was sexually abused by 3 persons, one of whom was my relative. After growing up, I am trying to evolve from such a shock and trying to develop myself like any other general boy. But the problem is that sometimes I feel an interest towards boys instead of girls. There is no doubt that I want to have relation with girls and not with boys. But I don't know why I am attracted to guys. I am in a dilemma. Please help.

(Name Withheld)

Ans: It is extremely unfortunate what you have had to go through as a child. Childhood is a time of innocence and discovery. What you went through is sad. There are lot of sick persons in our society who derive pleasure from such activities. Please remember that whatever happened to you as a child it is not your fault. Please seek professional counselling at the earliest. It will help deal with all your unresolved feelings and issues. Take care.

1. Hello madam, I am in the 8th standard. There is a boy who disturbs me along with his friends. If I pass by them, he and his friends always pass bad comments at me. I feel scared to pass by them. It is affecting my studies a lot. I keep thinking about it all the time. How do I get rid of this? Please help.

(Name withheld)

Ans: What you state is a serious matter. This should not be taken lightly. Please inform your parents at the earliest. They will deal with it in the appropriate manner. Do not engage in any kind of quarrel with this boy. Let the elders deal with it. If possible for a while do not move around alone. Take care.

(Ms. Gariasi Dutta, MSW (TISS) is a Psychological Counsellor at down town hospitals, Guwahati. She may be contacted at 98640-55560 or by email at dutta.gariasi@gmail.com.)