Harsha Mohan Sarma
(harshasarma183@gmail.com)
“We must teach our children to dream with their eyes open.”
— Harry Edwards.
This means rather than putting rose-coloured glasses on our
children and showing them dreams, we must help them become acquainted with the picture of reality with open eyes.
These days, every morning in front of almost every school, one can see a crowd of parents. In the case of private schools, this crowd is usually larger than in front of the government schools. Perhaps when money is spent on education, the sense of responsibility increases as well. Everything in government schools is free, and so the feeling of responsibility is lower. In private institutions, there are fees; once money leaves the pocket, awareness of responsibility rises. When you look at the faces of these parents, a picture floats before your eyes, a picture of them carrying some dream. Surely this dream is about their children.
Every morning, between 7 am and 8 am, parents bring their children to school and then, after the afternoon dismissal at around 12 or 1 pm, take them home again. Seeing this, we are reminded of our school days. In recent older times, there was no practice of parents personally dropping off and waiting for their children like this. Families often had five or six children. Which parent could take each of them to school? On top of that, there was always housework, weaving, and farm work to be done. Almost every mother had a loom. It was rare to find a household without cows, goats, ducks, or chickens. Parents fulfilled their responsibilities while carrying out their duties. Though there was scarcity, wastefulness was uncommon. Without mobile phones, people dedicated themselves to household work. Seeing their parents’ hard work, children too developed the mentality to work hard in studies. Thus, in those days, many children from poor families, without the help of any “guide” book, achieved good results in examinations and went on to become well-established. Of course, back then there was not the intense competition we see today. Good academic performance was enough to secure a decent position.
Today’s era is one of fierce competition. Out of India’s 140 crore population, only a few lakhs manage to secure good positions. For example, in the 2025 All India NEET exam, about 24 lakh students appeared, but only around one lakh, across both government and private institutions, could get the chance to study medical science or MBBS. The same situation prevails in engineering. Across India, about 25 lakh students get the opportunity to study engineering. Every year, around 1.5 lakh students graduate as engineers, but most do not find suitable placements. It is disheartening to see IIT graduates running small roadside shops or remaining unemployed. In the government teaching sector, vacancies are shrinking day by day. Many highly educated, talented individuals end up teaching in private schools or colleges for only 8,000–10,000 rupees a month. The scenario is no better in vocational education. Every year, lakhs of students graduate with vocational training, yet not even one-third secure good jobs. Many work in small companies for meagre pay, and some earn so little they must rely on financial help from their families.
Now, tuition and coaching centres dominate the scene. Tuition and coaching are not the same. Students take tuition to better understand a subject and score higher marks. Coaching centres, on the other hand, prepare students for competitive exams. But here’s something puzzling—if parents think government school teachers are incompetent and hence enrol their children in private schools, why do they still send them for tuition? And if they’re going to send them for tuition anyway, why not just enrol them in government schools? Is it because free education is less valued? What is the future of the lakhs of students taking tuition? Will securing higher marks ensure a secure future? These days, for every job, one must clear an entrance exam. In such cases, skills are often more important than marks. And what percentage of students in coaching centres actually perform well in competitive exams? On close examination, the average would be less than 10%. Yet parents, in pursuit of either their own dreams or their children’s dreams, spend lakhs of rupees, sometimes overlooking the actual capabilities of their children, increasing mental pressure on them. In the absence of a realistic perspective, the future of many children is shrouded in darkness.
The purpose of this article is not to discourage parents or students but to present a realistic idea. When parents spend four to five hours every morning waiting for school to end, isn’t that a waste of time? If they used that time for productive household work — like our parents did, tending to cows, goats, and ducks, sewing, and farming — the family’s economic condition would improve. This argument, of course, does not apply to salaried or wealthy families, who can hire people to pick up and drop off their children, afford tuition, and spend lakhs even if the child lacks aptitude. But how many such wealthy families exist? In a country where 80 crore people depend on government welfare schemes, it is unreasonable to blindly chase dreams without considering a child’s own interests and abilities. If a child never sees their parents working hard but only sees them idling away time, they will not develop the mentality to work hard themselves. Parents’ overconcern about safety after leaving children at school is not pure parental affection. It is a reflection of poor administrative arrangements in schools.
“Children must be taught how to think, not what to think.” Dreaming of making a child a doctor, engineer, or civil servant from the very start is unrealistic. To build a child’s future, parents must focus on two things: instilling a spirit of sacrifice and developing in them the ability to observe keenly. Many parents cannot sacrifice their own comforts for their children’s better future. While their children are studying, they spend time watching mobile phones or television shows, hanging out in shops or markets, or even consuming intoxicants in front of their children. In pursuit of their own pleasure, they destroy their children’s chance at a better life. In their hearts, they dream of making their children great, but in reality, they cannot demonstrate even temporary self-sacrifice.
Parental sacrifice inspires children to be resilient in adversity. It strengthens their moral character. Many parents also fail to understand their children’s likes and dislikes. Seeing a neighbour’s child become a doctor, engineer, or civil servant, they dream of the same for their own child, without assessing the child’s true abilities. They cannot recognise whether their child is better suited to be a doctor, a good mechanic, or a businessman. If a child is weak in studies, they assume the child is weak in everything, without considering that the child may excel in art, culture, or sports. Thus, they hold onto unrealistic dreams and live unhappy lives.
Dreaming is no crime. Everyone can dream. But if a dream is unrealistic, life becomes full of unrest. If dreams are based on a child’s capabilities, there is no reason to be disappointed. To realise a dream, planning is necessary. When one understands their limits and dreams accordingly, life becomes more fulfilling. “Dreaming, after all, is a form of planning.”